Saturday, June 13, 2009

I am taking over your computer

I'm not a big fan of calling tech support. To call tech support, you usually need to get through the army of automatic answering machines, press a sequence of buttons, and if the planets are aligned just right, you get to talk to a normal human being.
Anyway, last night I noticed that my anti-virus program was flipping out. The error it gave me told me that I needed to call tech support. So I decided I had nothing better to do with my evening (Sleep... BAH!), and I called tech support. After much preparation, and due to a little Astrological help, I actually got in to a living, breathing human being. This fine gentleman had a heavy Indian accent. Surprise Surprise :)
After being able to confirm who I was and that I truly did purchase their software, he asked me to start explaining the problem in as much detail as I possibly could. So I did. I read exactly what the error said to me. After hemming and hawwing for about 5 seconds, he starting giving me instructions. This is somewhat what our conversation sounded like:
"Sir, I am going to need your permission to take over your computer."
"...... ha ha... I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you right. It sounded like you wanted to take over my computer."
"That is right sir, I need to take over your computer."
".... whoa whoa whoa... hold on.... that sounds really creepy."
"I do not understand what you mean."
"Doesn't that mean that you will have access to all of my information and files and stuff?"
"I promise you sir, I will only be looking at the files that have to do with our software. I will not be taking your credit card number."
Anyway, after a little more coaxing and convincing that it was perfectly alright, I gave in. I had to download a small program, and enter in some kind of password. Then it started.
"Ok sir. I am taking over your computer."
I don't think I was really ready for what was about to happen. My mouse started moving all on it's own, and launching and downloading programs. I felt like the victim of technological Voodoo. The entire process of uninstalling the last version of the software and installing the latest version took about a half an hour, during which the kindly man from India was explaining his every move to me. I got kinda bored, and soon realized that I also had control of my mouse. This became somewhat entertaining, as I would every now and again wiggle my mouse and challenge his authority. This brought the reply:
"I am sorry sir, but I am not finished yet."
I decided it wasn't nice to interfere with the barbaric technological ritual, so I just sat quietly and watched. We eventually started talking, and I found out we were both Electrical Engineering students (which made this guy instantly cooler then his accent had already made him.)
"Well sir, we are about 99 percent done with the process." I couldn't see any progress bar, so I remarked:
"I don't see those numbers anywhere. Do you have something else that I don't that you're looking at?"
"I've been working here for about six months."
"No no, looking at, not working at."
"Oh, I am sorry. The number was just my estimation."
Once the process was complete, he showed me how the problem was fixed, and asked me if everything was satisfactory. I said it was, and we exchanged pleasantries, and I regained control of my computer. It felt good to be back :D. So what did I learn from this experience, you ask? I learned that Indian people are really nice. You see, when it was all finished, he showed me how to call back should I ever have a problem again. And the number he gave me would skip all of the automatic machines, and the planets didn't matter at all! I'm still not a fan of tech support, but I am a fan of Indians.

Friday, June 12, 2009

My Blog

Well, I am now starting a blog. I decided to jump on the band wagon because I have more time on my hands, and I really enjoy viewing my friends and siblings blogs. I don't think I can write anything near to the caliber of what they put out, but I thought I would take a swing at it.
So, about the name of the blog. There have been many times coming home from work/school/etc. where I would walk in the door, and my mom would ask from another room in the house "Who's that?" I would then muster all of the mellow drama I could and reply:
"It is.... I"
"Well, if it isn't Kitch Cadet and his band of Merry Men."
It was the most original thing I could come up with. I might change the name later or start a new blog if I come up with something better, but I think it will probably stay this way.
Anyway, I'll be posting about my adventures with my Merry Men, so please feel free to comment and check my blog often.